


Cringe

by Azriella_Helsing



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Bringing them back, Multi, Remember shameless self inserts?, Songfic in part, also likes to tag as shenanigans, author likes puns, cringefic, or maybe a hawt mess?, so many shenanigans, this is a hot mess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2020-07-30 19:27:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20102395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azriella_Helsing/pseuds/Azriella_Helsing
Summary: Shameless self-insert is shameless.Also, some Legion love!





	1. Yup, I'm Really Doing This

**Author's Note:**

> First chapter is short, but I'll write more!  
...You can take that as either a promise or a threat, as you please.

The Legion were still smarting from the Legends crew stealing the Lance from them at the Vanishing Point. Eobard in particular, was seething. He had underestimated his opponents, and that had cost them. He tried to bluff his way through the inevitable confrontation with the rest of the Legion, but inside, he was no longer certain of his plan. What if something else went wrong? His watch went off, telling him he needed to run, or the Black Flash would be on him. He had calmed the Legion somewhat, but he needed to run quickly and be back quickly, or tempers would flare. 

Sometimes his co-conspirators could be such drama queens. 

Before he could do much of anything, a shout of surprise caught his attention. Deciding to investigate quickly, he found one of the Legends was still there. 

It was the one of the Legends’ younger members. She was of average height, and within standard limits of build, and blonde. She popped another jelly bean into her mouth, ignoring the Legion. Only when Darhk cleared his throat did she look up. She didn’t look terrified, more annoyed than anything.

“Can’t you see I’m eating?” She said through a mouthful of candy.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Answers, solutions, and yet more questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, uh... nvm, I was going to excuse my tardiness, but now I think I'll skip it. On with the show!

To say Eobard was surprised was an understatement, but he recovered quickly.

“You should have left with the rest of the Legends.” He began, raising a hand and vibrating it, intending to shove the appendage through the girl’s chest.

But the girl had other plans. “Bold of you to assume that I’m still a Legend.”

Eobard dropped his hand, and was about to question, when the girl pulled him in for a kiss. It was a mere soft brush of lips, but Eobard felt the power behind it. When they broke apart, he saw red lightning in the girl’s eyes.

“What-?” He began to question, only for the girl to zoom away from him, running in circles.

“Stop!” Eobard yelled, “You’ll attract-”

A black blur sped towards the girl. Apparently, Eobard’s warning was too little, too late.

He didn’t understand why he cared.

The girl was now hanging limp in the Black Flash’s grip. The zombie-monster-thing was about to put his hand through the girl, when she broke free. The monster advanced on her, only to be pulled into a kiss as well, this time much deeper and more passionate than with Eobard. 

Eobard coughed, about to snark at the girl, when he noticed the flesh on Black Flash healing, and the emblem on his chest turning to blue. Wait, was that-?

Zoom broke the kiss and backed up a pace. The girl stared at him hungrily.

“You know our husband is going to hate this, right?” Zoom asked.

The girl only smirked. “Run.” she whispered, and Zoom was gone, messing up the girl’s hair.

Stunned silence graced the room, before the girl broke it.

“Oh!” She cried, slapping her forehead, “I almost forgot!”

She blurred into action, stabbing Captain Cold in the neck with some sort of black serum. 

“Ouch.” The man drawled unhappily.

“It’ll help for after you get blown up.” The girl explained.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Cold drawled again.

“It means,” said the girl impatiently, “that you’ll be able to put yourself back together after the explosion, and you’ll survive the vanishing point.”

“Do you want a thank you?” Cold asked.

“Gods, no. Don’t thank me. Putting yourself back together after being blown to bits? You’ll be lucky not to go mad.” The girl said quickly.

“Then why do it?” Cold asked. 

“Simple. Mick needs you in some form or other. I’ll just have to have faith that you can keep your stupid sanity.” The girl replied.

“And how long HAVE you been sleeping with my partner?” Cold drawled.

“Got there at last, have you?” The girl snarled. “You left him, in the worst way possible, and I was the only one who bothered to pick up the pieces.” The girl got closer into Cold’s personal space. “You had better become a man worthy of him, or I swear by all that is unholy I will feed you through a cheese grinder.”

“Oooh!” Chorused Merlyn and Dahrk.

The girl turned to them, still irritated. “I nearly forgot about you idiots. Lucky you, I remembered.”

“Gonna kiss us next?” Darhk snarked.

“I wouldn’t kiss you two if someone paid me.” The girl hissed. “However…”

She pulled something out of her pocket. It looked like the centerpiece to a Ouija Board, but with a button in the center where the socket would be. She clicked the button and a hooded figure appeared.

“Hello, Death.” The girl greeted politely.

“Hello, my heroine.” The figure said, with a touch of sarcasm, but with more apathy than anything else.

“I need to call in the second solid you owe me.” The girl explained.

“Do I not get a ‘please’ at the very least?” Death continued in that same sass-touched apathetic tone.

“Please?” The girl said, still politely.

The figure waved a hand, and a black cloud appeared at the girl’s side. “At your leisure.” He said, before winking out of existence.

The girl turned to Merlyn. “I warn you, I can only bring him back as a member of the darkness. He will need to consume blood to survive. I cannot help with your daughter, or your hand though.”

Merlyn looked confused, but the girl had already turned to the smoke. Taking a deep breath, she plunged an arm into it all the way up to the shoulder.

When she pulled back, another hand was clasped in hers. 

Tommy Merlyn stepped out of the cloud, eyes blazing red. 

The girl cut her palm, and Tommy bent down immediately to feast. The girl winced, but didn’t flinch, even as his fangs scraped her hand. 

After a minute or two, she said, “Enough.” and Tommy let go, eyes returning to their normal color.

Malcolm Merlyn stepped forward, tears beginning to bead in his eyes, and father and son embraced.

When Malcolm pulled back, he thanked the girl quietly.

“Don’t thank me,” The girl snarked, “YOU get to explain this mess to Oliver Queen. And don’t even think about hiding this from him, Tommy will kick your ass.”

Tommy nodded in the girl’s direction. “I would.”

“That’s all very well and good,” said Darhk, but what are we going to do about that?” He pointed towards the glimmer of smoke still remaining.

The girl clapped a hand to her forehead once again. “I swear, I’ll be forgetting my own head next!” At her gesture, the smoke coalesced into a tighter ball, and launched itself into Darhk’s chest. Darhk choked, gasped, then returned to normal. 

“What the hell?” he asked the girl, who grinned.

“If it were up to me,” she said, grinning ferally, “Fashes like you would get nothing. But unfortunately, you can do magic now,” She held up a finger, “With the stipulation that you cannot harm anyone currently in this room with it, and that includes emotionally.” 

Darhk looked at his hands thoughtfully, but the girl was tilting her head. 

“Sounds like my ride is here.” She said, before walking into the main room where the Occulus blew up.

A ship sounded nearby, one that sounded suspiciously like…

“You stole the Waverider from the Legends?” Cold asked.

“More or less,” the girl said, then spread her arms and fell backwards.

The ship that rose up with her astride it did look like the Waverider, but painted a glossy black. 

“Say hello to the Darkwave.” The girl said.

“Darkwave?” Eobard asked, finally finding his voice.

“It’s the Waverider with dark magic applied to it. The fact that the name just sounds like 90’s goth music subgenres just makes it sound cooler.” the girl replied.

“What’s your name?” Eobard called as a trapdoor opened and the girl made to jump into it.

“It’s Siren!” the girl replied.

“Hey, Siren!” Cold called. “You can’t just leave us on this rock!”

Siren rolled her eyes, and opened another trapdoor, one that extended to the ground. 

“Then by all means, come with me.” She said, sassily.

They went.


End file.
